Gravity defying bottom

Now when sometimes we want to praise a woman's figure, we take note of the texture of her bum. We like firm, toned bottoms which don't sag from the fat, and we sometimes term them "gravity defying bottoms".

However, did you know that all of us in a sense have gravity defying bottoms? When human beings evolved through the stage where they had to stand on their 2 hind feet, there was one more evolutionary feature that we needed. Whereas previously our anuses (anii?) faced sideways, now they faced downwards. From then on, the only thing that stopped the shit that accumulated from yesterday's meals from flowing down the sides of our legs was a combination of the strength of our anal sphincter (that's the circular muscle that holds you ass shut) and a resolute and grim determination.

Freud postulates that this constant fear is a big part of our human psyche, and that it manifests itself in an obsession for cleanliness and orderliness. Therefore when we meet a fussy, nitpicking and obsessed with cleanliness person we are bound to call him "anal".

Thus ends our non sequitur for the day.