Alcohol

Had an extremely interesting conversation. So I was saying that the most I ever drank was 20 glasses in 1 night. But I don't know, I never kept count. But I happened to mention, first that I probably had 20 glasses one night, and no, I wasn't drunk enough to throw up.

I hadn't reckoned that I had just said this to somebody who said that he'd have 8 pints and then pass out. So suddenly it looked like I was bragging. One thing led to another, and before long, I was booked for a drinking competition sometime next month.

Now people who have seen both of us interact will know that he enjoys taking the piss out of me from time to time. And also I know that he hates getting beaten and is therefore extremely easy to wind up, almost like there was this big red button sticking out the side of his body that says "push me! push me!" but this time I swear I hadn't intended to wind him up. These things just happen.

I guess there are things that I could have chosen not to say, like this chance remark I made to somebody that I could do some project in 1 day, and then he got hopping mad and took me to task for it for weeks (but every time he had to remind me that I did say something like that.) I'm like, whoa, some people really do take my shit seriously. Or maybe I'm so think I don't get it at all.

Later on, somebody told me that I shouldn't have revised my estimate of 20 glasses down to 15, and make it sound like I was unsure. I wasn't sure about that, but now I wouldn't have agreed with him. Goddamn I didn't want the challenge at all, all I did was to mention something that happened to me one night.

Yes, I agreed at that time because I thought it would be interesting to see how far I could drink. It was very interesting being drunk. And there are things you should do when you're young. But that night was different. That night was a friend's stag party. That night I did it on a whim. Drinking for leisure is OK. Drinking a lot on a whim is OK.

Drinking for sport... it doesn't sound enjoyable. Somebody at that table mentioned, "don't worry, this is not a social experiment". I was like, how much more blatant do you want to make it? Or maybe there are some people out there who enjoy getting kidnapped by aliens and having rectal probes inserted into him, they volunteer to do that for fun but I'm not one of those.

I'm starting to realise that I might not enjoy this very much.

Then later on somebody asked me, are you going to back out. I said, "I can't back out, I haven't got the balls". Which is not strictly true, and sometimes I will say something ironic and funny just for the sake of it. But that set me thinking, how will I get out of this?

What do I stand to lose if I back out? All my manly honour. (In other words, nothing I particularly care about) Would it be fun to just wind them up over and over again, and then abruptly call it quits? I guess that's another possibility. Yet another one is that I could go and grovel at his feet and beg for mercy. I'm sure that would be good for milking a few laughs.

I still remember the time I jacked my friend off when I was drunk because I somehow thought it was funny. Poor guy was traumatised for a week after that.

When you think about it, I'm probably the only person who decides whether this thing goes on. The other guy's in for it, he can't really back out because he proposed it. I'm the only one here who has options.

Of course I'm still curious about how much stuff I could drink. But not that curious. The ability to metabolise alcohol is not something worth bragging about. I personally think that burping competitions are more significant. As for whether I'd enjoy winning this particular competition, I know I wouldn't. There's something about competition I don't entirely understand. To gamble with your ego at the cost of ruining your health is also something I don't entirely understand. There is something a little sad about all this. There is "friendly competition". I always thought that it is an oxymoron. I approach competition in the manner of an executioner who is sick and tired of hanging people but nevertheless still has to get up in the morning and keep carrying out orders.

What to do now? Decisions, decisions, decisions.